Hello? Is anybody still out there?

There has been some talk, some mumblings, some texts exchanged.

The News Cruise may be happening again!

Stay tuned.

Episode 20: Rubber Thrusters

This week: a Jesus butt-print, short pony, and the greatest pogo stick ever.




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The News Cruise opens with discussion of Jesus' new method of showing his face. Also we discuss the greatest pogo stick of all time, while interjecting our safety philosophy here and there.

In "Obama Watch," Michelle gets a comic book deal but the girls are still without a dog.

The "Cute, Tragic, & Disgusting Animal story" segment brings us news of a pink dolphin! A short pony causes lots of distress for British emergency services. Finally, sadly, little hippoFarasi ("Swede of 2008") has a death sentence because those Europeans refuse to teach "abstinence only" in their zoo schools.

Crime? Dr. Rueben is a fake!

In "News Cruise for the People," a man is charged over eighty-one BILLION dollars for gas. My 2nd favorite story of the night (next to short pony): A paraplegic walks again, but then is almost immediately arrested on an outstanding warrant.

Finally, Chris and Meg breeze over some cool tech tricks that may or may not work and some guy quits his job in a delicious fashion.

Thanks for listening/reading. If you have questions, comments, concerns, hatred towards Chris, or anything of the sort please email us at TheNewsCruise@gmail.com

Also, if you have a picture of a great dane crossed with a dachshund please email that too. Tune in next week!

Episode 19: Woodward and Dumbstein

This week, Shaquille O'Neal is here in spirit as we discuss his improbably large feet, as well as the Addams Family and Chris' plan to get on Easy Street. Featuring Train Travel Stories from Dan White.




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Episode 18: We're Official

Chris and Megan waste time during the first half-hour to lead up to our first official News Cruise interview. We had a lovely phone chat with Joe Philipson (HI) and Carlos Urreta (NY) of Real Geeks Ride about their upcoming bicycle ride across the country! Visit their website to learn more about their adventure and how you can support them!

Unfortunately the recording of this episode didn't even make it five minutes into the show. So if you missed out, we're so sorry! But, we're crossing our fingers that we can get a hold of another recording.

News Stories of the Night:

Shenanigans! A victim pulls one over on some thieves. Tom foolery! A man is tricked into driving nine hours to see a fake woman. Nonsense! A teen tries to scam his way into $37,000 dollars worth of candy.

Love is in the air? Not if your date is constantly texting. Or if you're a sour-puss teen in Salt Lake City. However, if you're a 81 year-old magician, there is hope!

Also, an ostrich-related bird wreaks havoc on small village, pecks vet. And there is an island shaped like a heart. Awww.
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Tune in next week for an interview (hopefully; date not finalized yet) with one or more of the members of Hope for Agoldensummer.

Questions? Comments? Want us to interview you with silly questions? Contact us at TheNewsCruise@gmail.com.

Episode 17: Gettin' Weird

This week, Megan and Chris get weirder and weirder. Seriously. Also: pink iguanas, internews, and old lawyers.




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It's true, Megan and Chris do just keep getting weirder and weirder. Megan is so weird and forgetful that she forgot what order the news stories were in; so she's just going to list them:

-stinky foot student
-YouTube is still sensational
-Missing dog found after cold winter
-The CIA is thinking with their heads finally, or are they?
-Ecstasy is no more dangerous than riding a horse
-Americains cain't spel
-Python eats kitty
-A science project blows up and this isn't any volcano
-An old man pretends to be a parking lot attendant
-A thief with good taste.
-Another old man, gets his law degree

Whew, that was a lot of stories.

In other EXCITING NEWS, next week Chris and Megan will be interviewing Carlos Urreta and Joe Philipson of www.realgeeksride.com to learn more about their adventure. In the following week, a phone interview with Hope for Agoldensummer!

So, stay tuned and as always any questions, comments, concerns, suggestions, etc, etc should be directed towards thenewscruise@gmail.com and specifically as hate mail towards Chris.

Have a great week!

Episode 16: Socialist Reefs

This week, Megan and Chris discuss...not too much, unfortunately. Because of a recording malfunction, most of this episode has been lost to the ages. Still, what's left is pretty good.




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Taking a look at the economy Chris and Megan discuss a proposed "salary cap" on Wall Streeters that leads into a huge digression of incompetent Starbucks employees and wealthy battles between Tim McGraw and the Obamas. Cars and banks are not the only ones wanting help, the adult film industry is also looking for a pick me up. And finally, a glimmer of hope for Zimbabwe's currency?

Cute, tragic, and disgusting animal stories: A newly discovered sea squirt is carnivorous. An orangutan ruins t-shirts for his cage mates by using one to escape and un-escape. And finally, a crowd-pleasing walrus plays the sax.

American Idol judges misunderstand a colloquial expression. And a mystery 'stuntman' suffers injuries on the pre-production set of Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows.

Japanese students bring a piece of history that hits a little too close to home (this sentence is just awful, and i apologize). Lastly-the iPhone now does everything.

Thanks for listening. Have a good night.

Episode 15: Be Confident

In the first episode of the spring semester, Chris and Megan get back into the swing of things with an inauguration recap, goth kittens, and lots of twitter-talk.




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Chris and Megan discuss memories of the recent inauguration of President Barack Obama. Two Dutch youths use texting to get to Obama. Finger-synching of Yo Yo Ma and Itzhak Perlman much better performance than Ashlee Simpson.

In a special Cute, Tragic & Disgusting Animal Stories X Crime, we discuss shark thieves and gothic kittens.

In "News Cruise for the People:"Two blondes, too blonde? Also, a father-son duo make it across the South Pole

PLUS: Old toys! Angwy Whoopers are not the worst food, the Baskin' Robbins' large chocolate oreo shake is. Chris and Megan are going to split one, one day. Then maybe go running with Matthew Mcconaughey. Or not.
Keeping up with the times, the new Ritalin fad could be replaced by a "memory-pill" and the Pope goes Youtube!
Why we procrastinate.
Outlawedprofanity and finally something about bull castration.